Sairys (secondangel) wrote in hybrid_kin,

Hello. (:

I just joined, and thought I'd go right away and post an introduction, for I have a tendancy to lurk if I don't.

It seems the older I get the more confused I become, with sensations overlapping into eachother, causing me to become unsure of myself. I always attributed the phantom tail and claws to the clouded leopard I've always felt very akin to. However, the way I react to the world around me and the places I enjoy do not coincide with anything strongly feline.

So this is an introduction as well as me hoping someone might be able to make sense of all this.

I've discussed therianthropy with feline therians in the past, and based on their experience I'd begun to feel like I wasn't truly feline, or even therian for that matter. I realise there is a division between therians and otherkin, and recently I've been feeling like I'm shifting closer to the other side of that division with a new found connection to all things draconic. I've thought about how I've been feeling recently, which to me seems more like a dragon than any sort of leopard, but maybe I'm just being stereotypical.

Clouded leopards are a highly arboreal species, and as strong a connection with my "other side" is, one would think that I too favour trees and forested areas. In truth, I don't. I feel too pressed in and very claustrophobic. Having been forced to take a nature walk through one I felt extremely uneasy, because I could find no holes in the tree canopy that allowed me to see the sky. In addition, the plants pressing very tightly in on me made me uncomfortable as well, as if my body would get stuck in all the branching foliage, though I'm actually a very small person (making that impossible), and therefore that's a fairly irrational fear.

I liked climbing trees as a child, but I haven't recently. The maples and such where I used to live seem too flimsy to hold my weight, and again it's another situation in which I feel very uncatlike. The last time I felt confident in any sort of tree was when I climbed several live oaks recently. Their low, tangled branches made spectacular perches. ^^

I seem to prefer rocky outcroppings and sturdy hills, as well as wide open spaces like sprawling meadows or even clearings surrounded by the woods. I just don't like the woods themselves, even in the midst of a shift.

My confusion lies in the fact that I do shift, and often, which is something I've heard therians mention that always seemed to draw the line between otherkin and therians. Is it true that otherkin really don't shift? I experience shifts as well as phantom limb sensations.

Also, I still feel that which made me think I was a clouded leopard in the first place. Is it possible to be both feline and draconic? Or am I just injecting too much dragon stereotype into my thinking to attribute it all to my being a dragon?

I know no one can tell me for sure what I am, but I've never wrestled with such a problem before. I've only ever dealt with therianthropy, and so the world of otherkin is a very mysterious area for me.

As for my introduction, I go by the name of Nax and currently reside in Georgia. I'm eighteen and consider myself to be pagan. And I'm highly confused. X3

Any help will be greatly appreciated. I'm hoping that everyone on this community is alot more openminded than the people I knew on another community, in which they were extremely elitist and incredibly skeptical of anyone calling themselves otherkin. I recall expressing my feelings about the possibility of dragon in me and found that I was no longer taken seriously. As confused as I am, that set me back a bit.

Anyway, nice to meet you all. ^^
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